WOW! Kiss the girl Dima, be romantic! You know I don’t like to kiss you on the street. [AFRICAN HAPPY MUSIC PLAYING] He said he was coming in 5 minutes, it’s been 7 minutes already. Guys, I just remembered we need to go to that other place. Really? – Yeah. [MUSIC AND INAUDIBLE AFRICAN LANGUAGE] [MAN SPEAKING AFRICAN LANGUAGE] Bye! We’ll see you at… ? – Yeah, sure! Bye guys, bye! Look at this guy, he’s coming directly from Africa! That is why it took him so long. Leave him be. At least it’s good that he is here. Come on guys! Hey boy! Do you know what punctuality is? You are in Romania, here. You need to learn. And turn that awful music down. He’s black and incompetent as well. How are you, brother? – Hello! Hello! How is the city? Oh, very pretty! With all the lights, in Unirii Square. You can say you are in New York.
You know? And…. Hey! [SCREAMING OBSCENITIES] Let’s go faster! Drive your car! The ride is starting. Be careful, I have a big rock in the back there. I broke my phone.
– Be careful with this guy. Maybe he is doing witchcraft. He is doing spells to my …. Tell me why do you carry rocks in the back? I apologize, sir! I am new here. This is what I am saying! Put a rock in your mouth. [EXPRESSION ROMANIANS USE FOR GOOD LUCK WHEN SOMEONE IS IN A NEW PLACE FOR THE FIRST TIME] [PHONE RINGING – IT’S ANA-MARIA, DIMA’S WIFE] Yes Ana! Go ahead, say it quickly. I want us to break up! I left to my mother’s place and I also took the cats. What do you mean break up with me? We are married, papers and all. Are you crazy? You are under my name. I am not an object, Dima! It’s too late! You unconscious bitch! I love you! Bye! Yeah… I don’t really know how that happened. You treat her well, after all. Step on it, this is the reason she left me! You are driving like an African… snail. [SCREAMING] Arrrrrgghhhh!!!! The guy stepped on it! Didn’t you tell him to do so? Why didn’t you go straight? Where the hell are you going? Where are you taking me? Cape Town? This route is also good. These guys are stealing all my money! I swear to God! [PHONE CHIMING – INCOMING MESSAGE] [MESSAGE] “A 30,000 EUR bank transfer was initiated from your savings account. Current balance: 0 RON.” My savings account! These were my BMW money! My mother in law’s studio apartment! This guy is really doing voodoo!!! My money! Give me back my money! Give me back my money! You son of a …. [CHOKING] Arrrgghhhh! If a man does bad things, karma strikes him back! Buziba makes justice! Man!! This guy is dying here!! We don’t joke around with voodoo. What do you think is happening here? Fun and Stand-up? Ooooo! 5 stars and a 10 RON tip! Nice! Alright. [DIMA BREATHING HEAVILY] Yes Mrs. Ana-Maria. I’ve took care of your husband. He will not be a problem anymore. Yes! Goodbye! Sir, but what do you actually do? Uber or Voodoo? A bit of Uber, a bit of Voodoo. You know how things are in Romania. I’m getting by. And what about Dima and myself? Are we OK? [BUZIBA SPEAKING IN AFRICAN] Now I’m only doing Uber! Where to? Scene 1. Roll. [BLOOPER REEL]